I always enjoyed going to casinos recreationally — going with a set budget, playing some table games, getting some drinks, people-watching, etc. I found it enjoyable and my girlfriend would come with me, but she HATED it. She barely wanted to participate. The most she'd ever do is gamble $10 total, $1 at a time on the roulette wheel, and when the $10 was gone, she was ready to leave.
But that was at the beginning. The more we went, the more she loosened up and seemed to enjoy herself. She enjoyed slots the most, and I'd watch her play for a while, then leave to go play some blackjack, and come back to find her still playing on the machines. Not too big a deal. What I didn't realize is that when I wasn't around, she was gambling far above the level that I thought she was playing.
Eventually, it was her asking me if we could go back to the casino for a couple of hours. I had always stuck to my monthly budget. There were some days that she'd want to go to the casino but it wasn't within my budget to gamble, so I was now tagging along with her. It had become a full reversal. We didn't have joint accounts so I didn't know what her budget constraints may have been.
Months go by, the pattern continues, and suddenly one day she tells me that she's a little short on funds and needs help covering her rent for the month. A little surprising, but no big deal. A couple of weeks after that, I was intending to stay the night at her place, so I headed over there after work, but she wasn't home. And she didn't get home until early the next morning. She didn't answer any calls, no one had heard from her. And we don't share locations or any of that junk.
She confessed to me that she had been at the casino all night. She said she was trying to win back some of the money that she'd lost so she could pay back the money she borrowed from me. Overnight, she claimed to have lost over $10,000 chasing previous losses, which is unfathomable to me.
Obviously I'm devastated for her and want to help her in any way possible. I can forgive the money she owes me to help with the overall debt. But I don't know what I should do to help her break this habit and stop venturing to the casino. On top of that, I also have severe guilt for introducing her to gambling and convincing her to go with me in the beginning when she really didn't even like it. She was right to hate it at first and I convinced her to keep going back. I feel awful. What should I do to help her?
View Reddit by b_slow – View Source
